Product Description
You’re a natural born killer and there’s no escaping that awful biological truth. Your ancestors spent most of their time hunting mammoths and sabre-tooth tigers before dragging them back to a grateful Raquel Welch at the back of her cave. Now you can live-out myriad caveman fantasies by bringing death and destruction to poor Stan on a daily basis. And he, in return, will save your desk from becoming stained with coffee rings. And that sounds tikkety-boo to us. Those delightfully-named chaps at Suck UK have been innovating again. And this time they have pioneered the world’s first silicone rubber road-kill-cum-stain-stopper. It’s a visually impactful sight to see Stan for the first time. Fully thermoplastic and looking not unlike the late lamented Morph, Stan appears to have suffered death by crushing under a heavy falling object. But not from an anvil or grand piano. From your humble tea or coffee mug. Gosh. It’s an insult to call him merely a drinks coaster. For it is nothing short of his destiny to hold your mug rock steady on the desktop and absorb all manner of stains, which is why he’s fully washable to boot. We promise you’ll never look at a splatted roadside hedgehog in the same way again.

Suck UK Splat Stan

Buy Now for £4.99

Product Description
Martin Acoustic Guitar Strings  12-54, M140 These strings are the acoustic string of choice for musicians around the world. State of the art equipment winds the strings to exacting specifications. The result is a string you can depend on for tone, brightness, and clarity on a daily basis. Gauge 12, 16, 25, 32, 42, 54

• Acoustic Set Light Bronze 12-52

Martin M140 Light Bronze Acoustic Strings

Buy Now for £0.01

Product Description
You’re a natural born killer and there’s no escaping that awful biological truth. Your ancestors spent most of their time hunting mammoths and sabre-tooth tigers before dragging them back to a grateful Raquel Welch at the back of her cave. Now you can live-out myriad caveman fantasies by bringing death and destruction to poor Mark on a daily basis. And he, in return, will save you losing your place in your cherished novel. And that sounds tikkety-boo to us. You see Mark has met a sticky end, a squishy end to be more precise. His floppy body is trapped within the pages of your book, scrabbling to get out, all the while happily keeping your place. You know, keeping the page at that point in the story where the man gets crushed by a giant encyclopedia. Forget pressed flowers and old receipts, Mark is the future. And as he is dead, he may as well be put to good use. It would be almost rude not to.

• A novelty bookmark in the shape of a squashed man
• Made of yellow silicone rubber
• A perfect gift for a sadistic friend

Suck UK Book Mark

Buy Now for £1.49